I have confession to make…
I don’t want to be snuggled after a spanking. 😳
Typical protocol after a session, especially an intense session, is aftercare. That can mean something simple like providing water, evaluating emotional state, holding/gentle physical contact, rubbing sore muscles or applying aloe/arnica, or just talking.
After a spanking I am boneless and soft. Chemicals are zipping through me and I’m a drowsy girly. My eyes stay lowered, my voice is so soft, I feel little. I’ve been gentled and feel feminine and small. More so if I’ve cried during.
But I don’t want to be bundled up and held. I don’t mind being touched, I’m actually more open to sexual advances after a spanking.
A lot of people need the physical contact. I feel repelled (okay that may be too strong a word). The gentleman who spanks me at the moment requires that for aftercare. He wants to hold me, stroke my hair, give gentle kisses.
I’ve been thinking about it and the feelings I have after. It’s not that I dislike the sensation because I love being touched, but it’s too intimate for the vulnerable state I’m already in following the high.
Real talk: I struggle with certain levels of intimacy.
My brain works differently. Sex can be done with a level of detachment, but not kissing. I don’t kiss unless there’s a certain level of commitment because of how intimate kissing is for me. I don’t want to cuddle following a spanking for the same reason. I can be split wide open and made vulnerable by spanking and it’s hard for me to allow anyone to see that. I need to be away so I can regroup and I can’t do that with so much physical contact.
I know aftercare benefits myself and the person who played with me so I’ll continue to engage in cuddling with this play partner.
Maybe this is a matter of allowing someone in. My current arrangement is not permanent, but my mental self needs the anchor. It’s hard when I only want to be anchored to someone I know will always be there.
Maybe it’s a matter of finding the aftercare practice that ministers to me and the person I play with.
I’m probably the only person with an issue like this, but I’m curious what others do for aftercare?
Cooling my poor bum off. There is a very tiny g-string hidden under that. Nothing left to the imagination. 😉